Bull(shit)’s on Parade: FEEDBACK NEEDED!

Hey everyone,

High School english taught us the most valuable life skill of all: Pretending to know what we’re talking about when we actually have no f*cking clue

Today I’m starting up something a little different, and I’m curious as to how it will turn out but here’s to experimentation.   Back in high school, I began to realize that English class was essentially an exercise in Bullshit disguised as academia.  Essentially if you could write well enough and justify every claim you make in some way or another you can really pull an “effective” piece of writing from your ass.  I made use of this in AP Literature class, which I earned an A in without having ever read a single book that we were assigned.

Challenge… Accepted?

In any case, I thought I might see how my bullshitting ability has held up over the years and challenge myself to take a terrible movie and write a convincing review which praises it as one of the best movies of all time and justifies that claim.  So, without further ado, here’s how this segment is going to work.

I’m sure Mr. Whittaker would like to think that nobody remembers this movie… and he would be wrong

I am going to take suggestions from all of you readers on an ongoing basis for films that were genuinely horrible.  I will pick one of those films every week and make every effort to write a legitimately and overwhelmingly positive review of that movie.  It doesn’t matter if it’s Plan 9 From Outer Space or Gigli or (shudder) Transformers 2, I consider no challenge to great.  It may pain me greatly, but hopefully it will be worth it in the end 🙂

Like I said above, what I need from you all right now is suggestions for terrible movies to review.  Leave your pick(s) in the comment section and I’ll do my best to accept your challenges.

The Lesson hollywood has yet to learn. Don’t… Fuck… With Hitchcock

Finally, stay tuned for my upcoming set of posts on movie remakes in American Cinema.  I will separate the topic into sections for Action/Sci-fi, Drama, Musical/Comedy, Horror, and Foreign to Domestic Remakes.  Each section will include 7 featured sets of films with comparisons of overall quality and financial success, as well as a list down below of other remakes in that genre you might not even realize are remakes.  Stay Tuned…

About r361n4

I'm a student at the University of Washington Majoring Business. I've always loved movies and my goal is to work on the financial side of the film industry. Until then though, I figure I'll spare my friends from my opinions and shout them from a digital mountaintop for anyone who's interested. After all, if a tree falls in a forest and nobody blogs about it, does it really happen?
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10 Responses to Bull(shit)’s on Parade: FEEDBACK NEEDED!

  1. r361n4 says:

    BTW that is a Rage Against the Machine reference in the segment title… the pun factory in my head wasn’t coming up with much else

  2. Pingback: Bull(shit)'s on Parade: FEEDBACK NEEDED! | Rorschach Reviews | Have You Seen This Movie

  3. Jane says:

    Very interesting. Anxious to see how it will work out…

  4. atothewr says:

    Here’s a good place to start. I’m not sure if these are even on DVD, but it would be a good place to look.

    http://www.imdb.com/chart/bottom

    Good luck.

  5. Nacho Libre. Any Adam Sandler movie. Peace, Love, and Understanding.

  6. Jane says:

    The worst movie I ever saw was Nothing But Trouble with Chevy Chase and Demi Moore. Simply awful.

  7. I’m having trouble picking just one…But you should run through Uwe Boll’s entire catalog.

    • r361n4 says:

      Lol, Definitely going to go through some Uwe Boll movies, not to mention some Friedberg and Seltzer movies. Right now it’s looking like my schedule is going to be Avatar: The Last Air Bender, then Disaster Movie, then it’s a dead tie between the Super Mario Bros movie, Speed 2, Jaws 3D, and Battlefield Earth.

      • Yup…
        Pretty terrible choices.

        Actually, I kind of like Jaws 3D…When the shark is “swimming” towards the glass at the end but its tail doesn’t move. Great stuff.

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